‘Look Up’ by Jennifer Thompson
My first feeling was bursting with energy. Is that a feeling or am I being instructed to push through and exist? It’s hard to concentrate on the Voice when there’s this fire underneath me forcing me to the edge. Then a crack above me lets me know it’s time.
I’m meant to follow that noise because I can’t see anything. I extend myself and feel a ridge in the opening. I’m getting longer or at least a part of me is. Maybe I can just stay inside and send these tendrils out.
“That isn’t possible, Little One,” said that Voice from before. “If you don’t take this chance then there’s nothing for you left in there. Now is your time to show what you can do”.
“Where are you? No, wait, where am I?” I wasn’t afraid.
“If I were to tell you, that would remove the magic you’re about to create. Your purpose is to discover your limits yourself.”
“Am I strong enough for where you need me to go?”
“Only time will tell. I only need to guide you to your best, the hard work is down to you. You can no longer distract yourself from what is required today.”
“But I don’t know what to do,” I pleaded to my Voice beyond.
“Almost certainly. But you push anyway.” With that, something unravelled within me and it was leaving without my consent. Feeling for that crack again, I tentatively moved that tendril into the dampness.
“You won’t be alone, Little One. You can speak with me whenever needed and eventually you will find others.”
Okay… if I find others like me, I will do it. No more waiting, my tendril unravelling and ready to start. Start what I had no idea; but I guess that’s the point.
“That is the point isn’t it, Voice?”
“Hush now, and watch what you can do…”
***
The days are exhausting, and the results seem slow to begin with. I continue to grow outwards and downwards. Yes, I’m going down, always down towards something unseen. When a tendril gets to its location it’s rewarded with nutrition. I’m getting stronger, so I carry on with this process. I can feel how far I’ve grown but I’m still on my own.
“Voice, am I doing it correctly?” I plead to the dark.
As if on cue, I felt it. A creature is moving around me and stops to inspect me. It must deem me ready and I begin to follow until its vibrations are gone to whatever is above. I must stay here and focus on below. I won’t be ready unless I’m strong enough.
“Little One, what use is your effort down here if you refuse to grow up? The groundwork is well on its way and now for the next step. My friend showed you the way”.
Upwards felt drier, I knew it couldn’t give me what I sought. I was protected down here.
“You belong upwards and downwards, Little One. But you must experience both at once.” The decision was made for me, and I didn’t fight it as I was pushed to the surface and thrust in a blinding open space. The heat made me want to curl within and shrink. I focused on my home below and continued to grow there, but I could feel my upwards doing the same thing.
“Your downwards feeds your upwards, Little One. You keep doing what you’re doing.” So, I did. I keep my focus on below where it’s safe.
I find my upwards thrives in the heat but is relieved when the earth is rained upon. This makes me happy too. Then so much cold stops us both in our growth. I like to rest as much as possible in these periods. This continues for so many cycles, and I begin to hear less from my Voice.
***
I wake with an unease and find Upwards was shooting down a distress signal to me. It was struggling to find the light. I felt the urgency and myself lacking.
“You there, Sapling, do you need sustenance?” Came a message through my roots. It wasn’t my Voice, but someone was willing to help.
Unsure how to communicate, I silently willed a message: “Too much shade”.
“Leave it with us, we will send what you need”, and I shared with my Upwards to have hope.
I don’t know how they knew, but whatever they sent me I delivered upwards, and we started to heal from the shortage above.
Seasons continue, and we return our good fortune to the group around us, our hub. A particularly busy hot season had left others with scratching and crawling within and we sent warnings around. We were part of the network, and it seemed to give strength to my Upwards. Of course she was not alone up there, she could see the others.
“When will you join me?” My Upwards would often ask.
My response was always the same: “When my work is complete downwards”.
“Don’t you want to see what these seasons have achieved, what we have become? Come and look up with me, even for a moment”.
I whisper to myself, “You are grounded, you are immovable, and you are deserving.” I aimed up with such force I was momentarily blindsided at the feeling of enormity expanding within me. I’m forever reaching down and out and yet up here I am a column of strength. My limbs reach outwards in mirror to my roots below and they are brimming with luscious greenery that creates such shadows on the woodland ground.
Just then a creature catches my attention and scurries onto me and finds itself a spot nestled amongst my body and arm finding the warmth and rest it sought. I look up once more to see something diving towards me having seen something it needed to peck under my layers. Oh, but what is this, I feel them. All these beings under and on me; living their lives. They live in my security until it’s time to move on. As I must also do.
“Upwards, do you feel this joy within?”
“Not always but seeing it anew with you is remarkable”. We remained in companionable silence while Upwards let me breathe.
“Did you know you could achieve all this?” my other half pondered.
“Certainly not. But I was once told to watch what I can do. I should like to do more of that with you now”.
Jennifer Thompson wrote this story in response to the prompt ‘Look Up’, as part of June’s Just Write! short story competition.
